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Toolkit for Life
Feeling safe in your own body, first
Co-regulation is not only what we as human beings are wired for, but a biological imperative. Feeling 'safe' is key to combatting stress and feelings of hopelessness. However, as I have found in my personal life and as a therapeutic bodyworker, in order to successfully tend to the safety of another, especially a child's, we must tend to our own sense of safety, first.
If we don't learn to self-regulate and control our emotions, there will always be a gap between our perception and the way things really are.
Our nervous systems are designed to be flexible and move in and out of survival states. However, when our lives are out of balance, we function mostly from survival states where the generous, present moment is unavailable to us. Our minds believe everything equal to fear and/or hostility - even when it's not present. These hyper or hypo-arousal states tap our body's resources of vital health, energy and regeneration.
When we embrace the predictable nature of our Autonomic Nervous System, we are able to regulate our bodies properly. Learning how to self-regulate allowed me not only an intellectual journey of my biology, but it led me into a zone where I finally felt safe enough to live, not survive.
With self-regulation, I could successfully negotiate the subconscious thoughts, feelings and belief systems that kept me oscillating in detrimental habits, behaviours and relationships. Accepting my humanness allowed me to dissolve the suppressed shame about how, and why, my body decided it had to keep me safe. Today, I play mostly in the present moment and should life take me into stress, I know how to limit the time I spend there. I found some keys to emotional and physical resilience.
The Restore Method aims to hand you those keys. Once you establish your tools, you will become less responsive to your external environment and more responsive to the cues your body gives you. Knowing these messages are entirely automatic, you will learn to love yourself properly. You will respect your body's valiant attempts to keep you from danger. You will know what to listen for in your body and your awareness and patience of another's dysregulation will improve exponentially.
To become a self-regulating presence means you have embraced your body's automatic reaction to life. By doing that, you open the door for your unconscious agendas to be revealed and for you to start living consciously, from your heart. Choosing to become a conscious creator, you will realise surviving life is not living life and that regulating for life is non-negotiable.
The Restore Method comprises of 5 separate components that work together as one as a regular, or daily, practice:
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THE RESTORE METHOD SELF-AWARENESS JOURNEY FOR
Conscious Creators
The foundation of The Restore Method is to succesfully to self-regulate so that you can not only improve your mental and physical health and well-being but that you can create the life you love, and show others how to do it.
If you were to become the creator of your life, the fixed concepts, core beliefs and survival mechanisms you created as a child to overcome unpleasant, traumatic or abusive environments have to be addressed.
The moment the ego, your stoic protector, senses your willingness to address the unhelpful patterns and beliefs that have so far kept you from “danger”, it acts swiftly and influences your mind to believe going for what you want is perilous.
Your conditioned mind starts to resist the thought of following your heart. Your nervous system listens and launches its survival response. Unless you're regulating for the stress the resistance to the tension has created and the physical and mental discomfort this moment causes you, you will simply compensate for the tension and stress with your usual habits, patterns and behaviours and oscillate back into your Current Reality - the place you believe you're stuck in. A creative structure sees you going for your heart because you use the tension for what it reveals to create breakthroughs, think new thoughts, feel new emotions and make new choices.
The Restore Method uses tension to create what is in our hearts. Stress on the other hand, is when unresolved trauma is triggered when we go for our hearts. When we don't regulate the fear, panic, anxiety and distress, we simply go back to what feels familiar - survival mode.
If you're ready to undertake a gentle self-awareness journey to address the negative core beliefs, stuck patterns, behaviours and egoic agendas keeping you back, contact me for info on The Restore Method for Conscious Creators Workshop.
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