If your Sympathetic Nervous System is your external army, the one that fights, defends, competes and destroys to survive, the Dorsal Vagal branch of your Parasympathetic Nervous System is your internal army, the one that says: ENOUGH. I'm taking you into time-out, buddy, where you can rest, recover and rebuild.
If your Autonomic (may as well read: completely automatic, your mind has no say it in) Nervous System were represented on a ladder, Shutdown is on the bottom, Fight and Flight is in the middle and Rest and Digest is at the top.
To get from the bottom back to the top is going to take you a lot longer and it's going to require some supportive Sympathetic activation.
The last thing a shutdown body wants to do is get up. This is the place where long-term hopelessness turns into depression, where the body is too tired to harness even the energy for a panic or another anxiety attack, it simply is panic and it simply is anxiety. It wants to be hidden, unseen, unheard, invisible. It wants to disappear.
If you're human, you've had shutdown. Others get stuck there. Some go in and out all their life, kind of bypassing a sympathetic response, because, where a chronic threat is present, avoiding, feigning, fawning and pretending is the way to survive. Shutdown is as common as the grass outside your window because in one way or another, all of us have been overpowered, abandoned, controlled and abused and we had do 'freeze' our emotions to survive the onslaught. Who's to say what personal trauma is? What trauma isn't, is a one-off experience. It's an ongoing response in the body where our natural patterns of connection have been replaced with patterns for protection.
From the polyvagal perspective, every human has a predictable, 3-step response to stress and shutdown is the third and final response where the survival brain is in charge.
The nervous system state will always precede the stories, beliefs and perceptions. Shutdown sounds like:
"This is hopeless. I mean nothing."
Delving in and finding out what you need and don't get when you need to connect to the world that stresses your brain out enough for you to shut you down, can be the missing link to the emotional wellness you've been looking for.
Which of the following can you relate to, the most? Does the corresponding shutdown belief/perception match, for you?
Rejection - Sympathetic: I have to prove myself to be a good person. Shutdown: I am unworthy. Denies: Own needs and being a 'bad' person.
Failure - Sympathetic: I have to be the best at everything. Shutdown: I am not good enough. Denies: Emotions, especially depression for fear of being seen as a failure.
Abandonment - Sympathetic: I'll do what I can to stand out. Shutdown: I don't belong anywhere. Denies: Rejection for fear of being abandoned.
Being overpowered - Sympathetic: Keep it all in/suppress/repress. Shutdown: I have to control myself. Denies: Intimacy for fear of being violated/overpowered.
Feeling unsafe - Sympathetic: I have to stay safe. Shutdown: I can't trust anyone. Denies: Another's authority for fear of being violated.
Looking 'stupid' - Sympathetic: I have to find a way, there is a way. Shutdown: I don't have what it takes. Denies: Commitment for fear of getting it wrong.
Feeling helpless - Sympathetic: I have to overpower. Shutdown: I am powerless. Denies: Own weak spots and vulnerability for fear of being dominated.
Having flaws - Sympathetic: There is a right way and I have it. Shutdown: I need to be perfect. Denies: Their own ego/flaws for fear of being found out to be imperfect.
Not being allowed/free - Sympathetic: I have to fight for what I want. Shutdown: I am not allowed to show how capable I am. Denies: Inner knowing, intuition and own direction.
For a body in shutdown, adding energy is vital. Yes, yes, it's the last thing you feel like doing, but consider the following you can do in the comfort of your own home when your body is emotionally and physically drained, numb and exhausted:
Unpack and restack your bookracks.
Weed your garden.
Go for a walk.
Chew on ice, have cold showers or go for a swim (the cold water activates your sympathetic response and gives your body the boost of energy it needs).
Jump on a trampoline.
Dance.
Hum and sing - hum and sing in as low a tone as you can, to activate your Vagus Nerve in your gut. Most of your Vagus nerve fibres run from the body to the brain. So USE IT! Get the vibrations going - feel them.
The Restore Method guide has creative regulation practices for adults and children to show what the body goes through in shutdown and how to introduce the Ventral Vagal heart energy into that state to anchor you back into joy. It also offers an opportunity to take a deeper dive into any Negative Core Beliefs that might be keeping you stuck in that state.
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